OK OK - I don't want to bore everyone with tales of my kids, but tonight was a cracker...
Having strictly told the little one that he was not allowed any more biscuits, I stuck him in front of the one-eyed babysitter to watch a movie... Then I snuck off to have a sneaky cigarette outside the kitchen door.
Two minutes later, I heard the pitter patter of tiny feet, and the noise of the biscuit box being taken off the shelf.
I had no choice but to duck down, so he wouldn't see me through the window having a cigarette. My punishment for that cigarette? Listening to him chomp away on the biscuits!
So who's the grown-up?